Why I failed at National Novel Writing Month

Well, it's almost the end of National Novel Writing Month, 

and what do I have to show for it?

10,000 words and an outline.

Well I seriously failed at life. Here are some brief reasons of why I failed at NaNoWriMo.

#5 - School Work

Yes, I'm going to sit here and say that I had too much work. It's my third year in college and November is crunch time/every teacher decided they wanted projects turned in before Thanksgiving time, so I had portfolios and papers due.

Why it shouldn't be an excuse:
As a writer, you have a duty to the written word. If I want to showcase my ideas I shouldn't let things like school and work get in the way, if I did I'll just end up like all those people who say they should write a book but never do.


#4 - Family, Friends and Love Life

Because I am going to college away from my hometown, I don't get to see my family and friends as much as I'd like. Also my parents just moved about four states away so I've been calling and talking with them more often. Also, as a Public Relations major, networking and socials are crucial, so I've been talking and hanging out with friends and professionals all month. 

Also, I just started dating someone so my nights have been filled with this:

Why it shouldn't be an excuse:

Friends, family and relationships are going to be an intricate part of my life; they always will be. So if I'm serious about publishing a novel (which I am), I have to learn to balance my social life with my work one. Also use them as a motivational tool. 

#3 - Television and Reading

I am a story addict. I'm currently in the middle of about 10 television shows and 3 books. I love finding out about new stories and plots. Because of this I consume my time with other people's work when I should be focused on my own. 

Why it shouldn't be an excuse:

These works shouldn't be distracting me, they should be inspiring me! Influencing my work in amazing ways! Also, if I have time to binge on Netflix, I have time to binge on writing. 

#2 - "No Motivation"

I'm not writing my books for a grade right? It's not my job, it's something fun I'm doing on the side so I don't have to work on them very diligently. 

Why it shouldn't be an excuse: 

EXCUSE ME! This is your passion, YOUR story you crazy. If I don't tell my stories, who will? Also if I learn, work and grow with my writing it very well could turn into a career, so I need to get up off my butt and do something! 

#1 - I Simply Didn't Write 

The one piece of advice I have gotten from every teacher and author is: "the key to being a writer...it to write. Everyday." Even if it's something stupid as a rant about your day or something you care about. Either way, even if you think it's horrible, you have to write something or you don't have anything to work with. This is the philosophy of NaNoWriMo, to provide motivation to write at least 1600 words a day. Even if the novel turns out to be horrible, at least you wrote something. I thought about my book a lot. I figured out the whole plot line, each scene and everything...I simply didn't write it down. 

Why it shouldn't be an excuse:

Just because something isn't perfect doesn't mean you suck at writing. I am often way to hard on myself, rewriting and rewriting scenes until they are perfect. And this isn't a bad thing, it's just when you are too much of a perfectionist, you convince yourself that you "can't write this scene because it's not perfect in your head yet." I know in the future, I have to write more. That's simply the key. There's 10 years of hard work behind overnight success. 

Do You Want Some Imagery with That?

    I love good stories. I love good plot lines. When I sit and write for myself, I get caught up in the story. I love the dialogue and the interaction between characters, this probably from my theater background. However, I have a hard time describing the setting. Using imagery to convey the right image. In my mind, I know exactly where my characters are. I feel getting bogged down in the setting and imagery takes away from the story, slows down the reader.  In Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness the reader is lost in the scenery. I literally felt like I was trekking through the jungle trying to get through that novel. I wanted more story, more action.

    Yet when I write, I get comments like "describe this more." I know I have way more growing up to do when it comes to writing, but I guess I'm not in it for the imagery. Yes, I want the reader to know where we are and know what the characters look like, but after being in English class after English class, I'm tired of the literary jargon.  I want my readers to get caught up in the story, to love the characters and debate about what happens next. I want them to think about the big picture instead of  "need more abstract metaphors here."
    This post is in part a rant. I know I need to be open, more accepting of constructive criticism. I guess I'm still frustrated at myself for not being able to convey my feelings through a text. One day I will, and I will look back and say "Jessie you did suck at writing that particular scene, stop being so butt hurt."

The Beginning

    I've often had one problem when it comes to writing, and that's finishing a story. I come up with countless ideas for stories and I only write down a few. Some are horrendous and others are fantastic, that's when the motivation comes it...more like lack of it.

    I've always had purpose for the things I work on. The main purpose in my life so far was to make good grades. Writing assignments would be tied to classwork or extracurricular activities and I never wrote anything for myself until I started writing Alert. Though the name might be changed later on. (I used to call it The Front Yard.) Here's the story for how I came up with the Forates.

    I was 15 years old. I had just got back from a summer camp. I was going to confess to a boy there that I was in love with him, but he had changed since the last time I saw him and he turned me down.

    I sat in my front yard one night and I just cried. I lived in a suburb area. Not much activity at night, so I was talking to an empty colder sack. I cried and complained like the teenager I was. I was scared. Scared of going to college. I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up. (I still don't really know) I cried about how I would become a cat lady (that still might happen) and that I was alone, despite my loving friends and family all around me.

    Then I looked up for a moment and I swear to this day that there was someone watching me from the other side of the street.

    Granted it could have been a robber, neighbor or a tree but it caused me to run back inside and seek shelter under the covers. Ever since I was little I've been in the arts, singing, dancing and acting...so the creative in me started to calm myself down by telling myself it was this person's job to watch me.

Then the spark began...

Why did they have to watch me? 

He must be an alien gathering intel on the human race and he was assigned to me

If he's an alien, how stupid did I look to him as I sat there crying and confessing all my feelings?

Probably pretty stupid

What's his name?

Sky

    As my heart rate began to slow, more and more ideas came. It was like I was unlocking a gate and the gate is still flowing with ideas and excitement 5 years later. Whenever I came into a problem I thought about how my characters would have approached it and it's helped me overcome numerous problems.

I always say that I just don't have the time to finish this series and get it published, but I know deep down if I ever did finish it, a large part of my life would be gone and I don't know how to deal with it yet. So for now I'm still formally writing the first novel, spending just a little more time with my characters before I give them to the rest of the world.

National Novel Writing Month

    I've decided to sign up for National Novel Writing month in November 2013.

 And this scares me to death. I'm not going to enter Alert because I'm expanding it into a series, but I am going to enter another novel I've been working on called The Harmony of E. Not far from the science fiction. It's a dystopian story similar to Ally Condie's Matched.

  However it goes deeper into the flaws of society and deeper into the characters. This is only meant to be one novel, so I've decided to take the challenge this November to finish a novel! I already have about 7,000 words written so I'm excited to jump in and finish Evelyn's story. More details to come!

Just a short introduction...

Hi! My name is Jessie Bonham.

And if you came here for cats here you go:

But on the off chance you came here to hear my thoughts, I welcome you to my mind.

I'm writing a book. Correction, I've been writing a book for the past 6 years. When I say writing, I mean daydreaming about awesome plot lines and characters, and what they would do in my life. And now as I hold a stack of 200 pages written, 3 different drafts on my computer and a cast of characters in my head, I realize that my fear of imperfection and lack of motivation has been holding me back.

I have been writing this story since my sophomore year in high school. Back when the future terrified my to death and I had to create an entire new world to protect me from it. Though the future still scares me a bit, I am no longer letting my fear cloud my creativity.

I'm taking on a new challenge. A blog everyday with updates, thoughts and feelings about my writing. My aim is to ignite my passion once again for these characters I've held so close for so long. In a way, I think I haven't been able to write their story because I'm afraid of loosing them, but they deserve to be heard, even if it's through my word vomit on a page.

So there it is, a new journey. Let's see what happens.